Introducing the idea of a new baby to your child

It can be hard for a child to understand the notion of being a big brother or sister, especially if they're still quite young, it can be a daunting idea for them to get their head around. Luckily there's lots of ways to go about preparing them for this new and everlasting role in their life and here are a few of the things that helped us with Lily.

When I first found out I was pregnant I wasn't really sure when and how I'd go about telling Lily. She was 2 and a half at the time and I wasn't sure if she'd really understand so me and James both agreed to wait until nearer my due date so that 1) she wouldn't have so long to wait before she became a big sister and 2) I'd have a big bump so she'd actually be able to visualize a baby in there.

As it so happens it didn't work out that way as I was so ill and poorly with hypermesis in the first trimester we felt she needed an explanation as to why mummy was in bed so much and not looking after her like normal.

I'll actually never forget the moment we told her she was going to be a big sister because it went so much better than either of us had anticipated. We'd just got back from the park and told her we had a secret to tell her. I was feeling sick so I got into bed and she climbed into bed next to me and asked what the secret was and so we told her. Her reaction was amazing! She got up on the bed and started jumping up and down shouting 'yay I'm going to be a big sister' over and over! I wish I'd filmed the moment actually but James managed to snap a few photos as he still had his camera round his neck from the park! I cried because I was a hormonal pregnant lady haha but also because it was so nice to get that kind of reaction from her as I'd been so worried about telling her.

*Lily's reaction to being a big sister

At that point I dont think she fully understood what it all meant though, not like she does now. She knew that she would be a big sister but didn't understand that the baby had to grow in mummys tummy first. Infact she'd look at me like I was mad if I tried to tell her the baby was in there! She was so impatient to know when the baby would get here so we had to tell her that she'd have to wait till after Christmas time and so she sort of forgot about it all for a while.

Since I've been showing though (and boy am I showing!) we've been slowly introducing the idea of the baby being around by letting her be involved in all the baby related decisions. For example we let her come with us to choose the baby's car seat and we let her choose what colour dummies the baby might like and what bedding to go in the moses basket and as a result it allows her to get excited about the baby's arrival and feel like she's got a part in it all.

What we've found to be the biggest help is reading books about becoming a big sister. This is what really seemed to first get Lily interested in the idea. My favourite is 'What's in your tummy mummy?' by Sam Lloyd. This book addresses the idea of there being a baby in mummy's tummy in a humourous way by suggesting there might be all sorts of animals in there first. It's a flap lifting book and Lily knows it off by heart now, it's always the first book she asks for at the moment. Another favourite is 'I'm a new big sister.' I especially like this one because it talks about how special being a big sister is and talks about all the ways you can help mummy and daddy - such as by tidying up your toys or helping to feed the baby. Another good one to mention is 'The new baby at your house' by Joanna Cole which Lily's granny brought for her to read with her at her house. The book is a bit different because it talks about realistic things such as mummy having to leave to be in hospital for a few nights and the fact that it's okay to feel resentment towards the baby sometimes which is good because I think kids should know that it's normal to feel that way too!

We've also put together a 'big sister basket' that we're going to give Lily from the baby when she comes to visit us in hospital. I've been worrying a bit about her feeling left out or upset when she comes to visit the baby for the first time and I think giving a few gifts from her baby brother or sister will really help break the ice!
Thanks for the idea Pintrest!

What did you do to prepare your little one for becoming the older sibling?

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